From learning she was expecting twins during her first pregnancy to finding out baby number four was on the way last year, Michelle Barns of Denton is well versed in navigating the surprises life can present.
“Number four was a total surprise,” says Barns, 30. “I never anticipated having four kids.”
Nevertheless, she’s thriving as a mom of four—Ava and Jaelyn, 8, Levi, 3, and Lucas, 3 months—all while running her own online clothing boutique, Bugs & Roses.
Every day is a delicate balance. But with help from her husband of nine years, Will, a former Marine who now works as a train dispatcher, and nearby family and church friends, she makes it work.
How has the new baby changed the dynamic around the house? I anticipated my toddler being jealous, but he’s been really good. The difficult part has been I need to sit down and nurse, but the other three need to eat, too. Or I need to eat and I can’t.
Did you always want to be a mom? I did. I struggled through high school thinking, “What do I want to do in life other than be a mom?” When we hit two at once, we thought we’d wait a few years and maybe have another.
What’s your parenting style? That’s hard. It varies from child to child. I’m pretty strict on my girls, but I don’t think I’m overly strict by any means.
What’s your No. 1 rule? Probably to pick up after themselves … or just to sleep. The girls are early birds.
What’s been most challenging about motherhood? That has changed over the years. My husband was active duty for a few years and had two deployments when the girls were little. It was hard raising two kids alone. Now, it’s just finding a balance. Making sure I’m raising them right but not being too hard on them.
What’s most rewarding? Everything. The bond between the three older ones is amazing to see. It will be even more rewarding to see once the baby is a little bit older.
What’s the best parenting advice someone’s given you? To be patient. It doesn’t last forever, which is good and bad. Take one minute at a time, especially in these early days when it can be hard and exhausting.
Worst parenting advice? When people say sleep when the baby sleeps. … It might work with the first one, but once you add more they expect to be fed, bathed, clothed and played with too.
Do twins run in your family? They do not. They were a complete surprise.
Do they have the crazy twin bond we hear about? Yes. They lose teeth at the exact same time. One has gotten a bruise and a mark will show up on the other one. It’s really weird.
How did you get into sewing? I hadn’t sewn a thing in my life. After we had the girls and saw how much money we spent on clothes and bedding, I was determined to be frugal. I decided to buy my first sewing machine and teach myself with YouTube and Pinterest. I made curtains and bedding and then moved on to clothing.
What inspires your designs? Denton has been an inspiration because it’s a little bit hipster.
What are your best sellers? Funny enough, my best seller is my kids’ underwear. They’re cute, comfortable and organic. I started my business making shirts, shorts and cloth diapers, and as my kids got older, I just started testing other pieces of clothing. Friends started seeing the underwear I’d made for my son, and the response was so positive. They all said they would buy that. Moms buy the underwear because I don’t put elastic in it like typical underwear so it doesn’t cut into the child’s waist or legs. It’s all just fabric.
Any future plans for the business? Right now, I take it day by day. We’ve had a lot of change in the last several months—a new baby and a new house. It’s all been good change. But it’s been a lot harder than I thought it would be. I thought my fourth baby would be easy going, but he’s been fussy and needy, so I don’t devote as much time to the business right now. In the future, I hope for it to become a second income instead of my hobby.
Are you ever able to take time for yourself? Not much. There are just not enough hours in the day. Taking a bath is probably the one thing I do for my sanity. But these days I’m lucky if I get one of those.
Do you ever get time with girlfriends? Before I had Lucas, I did have regular girls nights. I’m trying to find the balance now. I think once Lucas isn’t so needy, I’ll be able to meet my friends somewhere around the square for a couple of hours just to get away and chat.
How do you and Will stay connected? We got to go out the other night. We left all the kids with my parents. Even when I was pregnant, we’d try to make date night every week.
Where do you like to go? We like going to the square to have dinner and get an ice cream. We love Rooster’s Roadhouse, Barley & Board and LSA Burger Co. For drinks we like East Side Denton, Paschall Bar and Mulberry Street Cantina.
What does your perfect day out with the kids look like? They love to go to Rooster’s or Mellow Mushroom, get Beth Marie’s Old Fashioned Ice Cream and walk to the courthouse to play on the lawn.
