In the February issue of DallasChild we introduced you to Matt and Mary Emma Hawthorne. This fantastically creative duo – he’s a photographer, she’s an artist – was the subject of that month’s Nesting profile. One chat, one look, and we were in love. Not only were we enamored with their art-meets-architecture design style but with Matt, Mary Emma and their toddler son Oliver as well. So when the family of three grew to four over the summer, we had to know all about flying trains, trips through the Bishop Arts District and how a little girl named Greta makes them complete.
How has your marriage changed since Greta was born?
Mary Emma [ME]: After having Oliver, Matt was able to see and know what my needs would be with Greta, and he’s jumped in seamlessly. A huge amount of stress has been taken off my back, which has allowed me to just mother better overall, which I greatly appreciate being able to do.
Matt: I was reminded once again that having a family is a decision we made to commit ourselves to each other and our children. Our time has gotten even tighter, and we’ve had to really focus on our communication and patience.
Tell me how your relationship as husband and wife impacts the way you parent.
ME: We respect each other’s decisions and tend to agree on the way we choose to discipline. We feel it’s important to make sure Oliver knows he’s being disciplined out of love in an effort to teach him well, not to take something away from him.
Matt: We’re also very committed to our church and community group (the group is three other couples with children that live within a mile of us). We meet weekly to talk about our marriages and how to grow spiritually. Having this commitment to other Christ followers has helped completely in how we make decisions to parent our children.
How do you stay connected?
ME: We get out! Matt’s amazing when it comes to finding fun things for us to do as a family. Last weekend we had the most delightful evening strolling the streets of Bishop Arts with Oliver and Greta. Sure, we had to work around feeding times and find a place to “park” it for a bit, but it was totally doable. In fact, we found a cute park and we stopped to feed Greta, and Oliver got a chance to run off some built-up energy before dinner.
Oliver: The Big Brother …
ME: He’s adjusting as well as any 2-year-old would. He loves Greta, he asks for her every morning, he loves to kiss her feet and help give her the pacifier when she’s crying. But, poor guy, he’s still just trying to figure it all out. He wants to be held when I’m going to Greta’s room or about to pick her up. And we need to teach him not to throw his trains in her direction or to butt her tiny head – boys, yikes!
From three to four – what’s been the biggest change?
ME: Finding enough patience to give to all four of us.
Matt: Scheduling.
ME: And scheduling! Having a loud, on-the-go toddler, I find myself always planning play dates with other moms. Each morning, I rely on Matt to help me figure out how to get Greta fed and all of us dressed and out the door on time.
The greatest joy?
ME: Their precious faces and personalities and just knowing they are entrusted to us from the Lord. Matt and I both love them so much and just want to be with them as much as we can. Obviously the sweet times are more fun than the difficult times, but those wouldn’t be nearly as sweet without the hard times.
The best surprise?
ME: That my Oliver is so compassionate. I knew he would be, he’s so tender-hearted, but to see him care for his baby Greta is just the best. I didn’t even go there in my mind as to what that would be like, but I have been positively surprised by it.
Matt: What she said. [Smiles.]
Is two the magic number?
ME: Absolutely. We are done!
Published September 2013
