Conventional wisdom might suggest that joint educational playtime (with two differently developing siblings) could pose too much of a distraction to either child’s learning progression. Catherine Sang, therapist with The Parenting Center in Fort Worth strongly disagrees. In fact, says Sang, “When a toddler sees someone near their own size complete a task, it’s easier for them to mirror and cognitively understand.” It’s much the same with children at differing levels of development.
Additionally, as Suzanne Bonifert, head of speech-language pathology at UT Dallas Callier Center for Communication Disorders points out: “These children are so often separated that it’s really important to let them learn and have fun together. Being social, sharing, bonding with siblings and having fun is critical for the atypical learner’s development.” And, she adds, when your kids play together, they’re not only boosting brain waves—they’re building a lasting sibling bond that’s just as essential as a good education.
Picking the Perfect Playtime Activity
The first step toward creating an all-inclusive learning game is to identify your kids’ interests and determine where they overlap. Targeting a shared interest is key to involving kids “because they will be naturally inclined to participate, no matter the difficulty level.”
While thinking up a game that appeals to everyone and meets the needs of your child with learning challenges, as well as typical siblings, sounds tricky, Bonifert assures, “it’s not super complicated at all.” Both experts agree that it all comes down to hands-on help from mom or dad. And Sang adds: “When the whole family is involved (mom, dad, sister or brother), that means that the kids are not only playing, they’re mimicking the behavior and values of their parents [and older siblings]—a lesson that’s hard to teach.”
For example, consider whether “they [all] like games that involve motor skills or movement,” suggests Bonifert. “If so … make your own obstacle course in your lawn.”
“Parents can take any game and adapt it to a child’s special needs by giving that child extra cues or directions in a way they can understand,” says Bonifert. Even educational activities like reading, painting or playing an instrument can be made suitable for a child with or without learning challenges.
Find “a game that’s not too high level and reach a happy medium between your typical and atypical child’s abilities,” suggests Bonifert, who utilizes games such as Red Light, Green Light in the center’s therapeutic programs involving siblings. “Typical kids will catch on to the directions quickly, whereas an atypical learner might need extra directions. We also use visual signs, rather than just saying the directions,” she adds. Other popular examples of joint playtime activities are shared songs like “Heads, Shoulders, Knees and Toes,” playtime activities involving smaller-scale parachutes (that kids hold onto in a circle and flap up and down), reading large storybooks (with a parent asking developmentally appropriate questions about the story to each child) and more.
And for older kids, playtime can be just as educational—even for kids who may be on different cognitive levels. For instance, Sang suggests role-playing to let children’s imaginations run wild. On example: “If your older child is learning about the Constitution, why not have dress up and let the kids act like the members who helped create the Constitution?”
All That Ends Well …
Whatever game you choose, parents shouldn’t relinquish themselves to the sidelines. “Both children, no matter their [level of] development, will model the behavior of the parent (or at least try); this teaches them important behavioral and social skills,” says Sang. And, what’s more, a parent’s example during playtime also helps instill family values, which aren’t always an easy (or fun) lesson to teach. But, through shared activities, your kids will gain confidence, knowledge and benefit from a little stress relief as well.
