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Victorya Rogers

How did a California native working as a Hollywood agent for 11 years end up in North Texas? Love. And, of course, Hollywood has its issues. “It’s not really the place to live happily ever after with a family,” Victorya Rogers says. But Victorya’s path to love – and Texas – took a few twists and turns, as well as time. Turns out she was great at dating (she’s written two books on the subject) but wasn’t finding the right man. That is, until Will Rogers from Oklahoma bumped into her in the lobby of the hotel where the Golden Globes were being held. Victorya and a friend got Will backstage passes and VIP access to the awards ceremony, but Victorya jokes that with Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise in the same room, it wasn’t exactly love at first sight. A year later the two reconnected in Hollywood, and it was love at second sight. Fast-forward through some distance dating, a move to Southlake and two kids (Katie, 10; Matthew, 11), and the couple has been living happily ever after for 15 years now. Victorya has turned her Hollywood experience into several careers, including life coach and author. Oh, and she can also help you write a book or buy a house. Possibly the only thing she misses about her old life is not paying for concert tickets.
What was your life like as a Hollywood talent agent?
I represented producers, writers, actors. As an agent I had to be in charge of their entire life. I sold an animated show called Two Stupid Dogs. I got to go to an average of two concerts a week. You never had to pay for them, and you always had backstage passes and the good seats.
How did you go about earning a master’s in theology while you were in Hollywood?
I was starting to get burned out. I had been working on my law degree. I knew I needed a life after Hollywood. I saved up a year’s worth of pay and started getting my master’s at night, and I became an ordained minister.
Now that you’re married with two kids and away from Hollywood, you’re writing books, dishing on dating and doing life coaching. Was that a natural transition?
I was used to giving advice all the time [to talent]. I had dating down to a science. In 18 months, I went on 100 blind dates; 98 percent of them asked for a second date.
And all the while you were taking notes, which became fodder for your books on dating. Any good advice for the single moms out there?
Bottom line: Be interested in getting to know the other person. Let them talk about themselves and find out what they’re interested in. But don’t pretend to be interested in something you’re not. Don’t be too needy.
Speaking of books, tell us about the two you have coming out in 2013.
We are updating and revising my first book, How to Talk About Jesus Without Freaking Out. And I’m co-writing Hot and Holy Sex: Real Answers Your Parents and Your Preacher Haven’t Shared. I'm the relationship coach, and my co-author is Debby Wade, a Christian sex therapist in Grapevine. We both know this is a much-needed book to help married couples build closer and more satisfying intimacy.
How did your life coaching career come about?
Cosmo and Glamour started asking me to answer questions on dating. I had people from all over wanting advice. I help people online, on the phone or face to face if they live in Dallas-Fort Worth. I love helping people make choices. [A lot of my clients] are college girls, but 60–70 percent of my clientele is over 40 and making life transitions. Seventy percent of the college girls ask about relationships; the rest ask about careers. We just have to pull it out of what they want to do with their lives. Of all the skills you’ve had in your life, what brings you the most joy? You can get that passion fulfilled.
You also have a real estate career. Does that allow you flexibility in motherhood?
I probably work about 30 hours a week. I might show two houses a day. One [career] is my ministry, and the other helps pay the bills. Whenever I travel to speak, my children come with me. Sometimes they go with me to show houses.
Any promising news for the Fort Worth real estate market?
The great thing about DFW is we’re on the upswing. We’re getting closer to 2008 prices. Right now appraisers are so conservative, though.
And on top of all of that, you’re on the First Friday Women board in Southlake.
We bring a speaker once a month. It’s real talk for real life. Priscilla Shirer shared some wisdom that was great. And Ron Hall, who wrote Same Kind of Different As Me, was great.
What sorts of things does your family do to stay connected?
Last night we played dominoes. We used to try to do it every Monday night.
How do you stay on top of what your kids are facing?
I’m a big believer that defiance from kids has to do with nutrition. I make sure we have enough protein and Omega-3s. Every challenge I’ve had I’ve read like eight books on the topic. I like to get advice from people who’ve been there. But just because you read it, don’t believe it.
As a mom of older children, any technology insights?
You should look at their texts every once in a while. It is your right to read it – not to be snoopy but to be a caring parent. Don’t do it behind their back.
Does your family have any Thanksgiving traditions?
We go around the table and say something we’re thankful for. We always try to pay attention to our blessings. Life can change at any moment. God’s a big part of our life. Our kids are always thankful for our day in the midst of all the bad things that happen to us.
Your family has been through a lot over the last year, but you still have much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
On December 1 last year, we had been in California [on vacation] for one day when someone burned our house down. You just have to say, “God, what is this about?” As bad as it is, my kids are still alive. I’m always trying to learn a lesson.
Does your Thanksgiving table have pumpkin or apple pie?
Pumpkin. But the irony is that it’s usually me that ends up eating it. Every bite has to have whipped cream.