DFWChild reader Danielle of Dallas County, wrote to us: “I need advice on weaning my breastfeeding toddler. We’re down to three times a day—morning, before nap, and before bed. Breastfeeding past infancy is very isolating. It’s the most challenging and rewarding part of motherhood—and weaning feels so hard.”
For answers in this Sound Advice column, we reached out to Dawn Schindler, RN, BSN, IBCLC, at Children’s Health in Dallas.
Dawn Schindler: Extended breastfeeding—until your child is well into toddlerhood—is perfectly normal, and it’s also normal to feel ready to move on. And if you’re ready to wean, leave the guilt behind—you’ve done an amazing job.
When you’ve decided it’s time to wean your toddler, defined as a child over the age 1, the best advice is to not force weaning all at once. You know your body and your child best, so figure out what weaning methods work best for you, but understand that it can be a gradual process requiring time and patience. Start at a pace that allows plenty of flexibility for your body and toddler to adjust accordingly.
Here are some tried-and-true tips for how to begin weaning (slowly) and make the transition a bit easier:
Develop new routines.
If you and your child have built a morning, before-nap and before-bed routine, be prepared to start new routines during these times. Try introducing new, exciting routines instead—reading a story, listening to music, playing with stuffed animals or toys, taking a bath, etc. Over time, your toddler will become more fascinated with the world around them and will be more excited to engage in new activities, too.
Involve others.
If your child is struggling with new routines at first, ask another caregiver, partner or significant other to help put your toddler to sleep until they are fully weaned.
Substitute a sippy cup.
If your toddler is asking for the breast, slowly begin to wean by pumping your supply into a sippy cup. Over time, as the toddler has gotten used to the cup, begin adding in some whole milk. Then introduce other beverages until your toddler is completely weaned.
Gradually stop nursing your little one to sleep.
If your toddler has always fallen asleep on the breast, they have likely not learned to self-soothe, so weaning can be a much more difficult process. If this is the case, move nursing to earlier in the evening and replace it with another new routine, like bedtime stories, music, etc.
Be mindful of what’s happening in their world.
As you start weaning, be sure to pick a time that isn’t filled with other major changes in your child’s life. This can mean less attention with a new baby at home, a recent move, starting at a new school, a recent illness or even graduating to a new bed. If your child is already dealing with these transitions, it may not be the best time to start weaning as your little one may need extra comfort during this time.
Offer your child extra love.
Don’t forget to offer extra affection during this time of transition! Replace breastfeeding with other forms of physical contact or expressions of love—hugs, kisses, cuddles and words of affirmation.
Every parent and child dynamic is specific and personal, so don’t compare your journey to others. With time, patience and consistency, you and your toddler will adjust.
RELATED: Sound Advice: How Long Should I Breastfeed My Child?
This article was originally published in October 2023.
Top image: iStock
