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Daddy Fails

“My wife had to work one Saturday, and my 2-year-old daughter woke up sick. I took her to the doctor then stopped by Target on the way home to get her prescription filled. While we waited, I let her pretend to shop. She peed her pants, I left everything in a pile next to her puddle and ran out of the store.” —Scott, Dallas
“The one time I had to take our 4-year-old daughter to swim lessons, I put her swimsuit on backwards and didn’t realize it until I got her home and my wife laughed at her plunging-V one-piece.” —Bob, Dallas
“Before laying my 18-month-old daughter in her crib, I hung her upside down by her feet. She was laughing. When I tried to right her by grabbing one wrist, she said, ‘Ow!’ and couldn’t lift her left arm. I took her to the ER. I had popped her elbow out of the socket.” —Brendan, Colleyville
“I was cooking dinner and went into the yard to ask my wife a quick question. When I came back in, my 2-year-old son was holding the chef’s knife Chucky-style.” —Zach, Fort Worth
“I let our 16-month-old daughter color with Sharpies on paper I had put on the floor for her. Needless to say, it got everywhere.” —Todd, McKinney
“My wife was on a girls-only getaway for five days, and I was responsible for doing everything for our three boys. One day, I accidentally sent my 9-year-old to school without his homework or books. His teacher emailed my wife and me to say this: ‘Brady told me that his mom is out of town, and his dad doesn’t know what he’s doing.’” —Ryan, Dallas