How Nasiba Adilova is Adjusting to a Family of Four

Q&A with the co-founder of The Tot

Nasiba Adilova is a street style star and co-founderof The Tot, an e-commerce site with editorial content and brick-and-mortar experience with a Highland Park Villageboutique and a conceptual “playhouse” shop onLovers Lane. Her Instagram (@naseebs) touts over 100,000followers and her distinctive look has graced the pages ofVogue, Elle, Harper’s Bazaar and other glossies. Together withhusband Thomas Hartland-Mackie, the Russian-born Dallasiteis raising two sons—Thomas “Thom Thom,” 3, and Daniel, 11months—and doing it in style.

How do you balance running a business with raising two kids?
I go with theflow and so do my children. I’m afan of listening to a child’s needsversus imposing what you want on them. Luckily, I have the typeof support I need to be able todo that. When I travel for work, Ibring my littlest one and a familymember or nanny to supportme while I’m in meetings. Mytoddler is in school now so heneeds more structure at home.On the weekends, we all have a
bit more fun.

Did you and your husband always want a big family?
My husband and I are both onlychildren so we wanted a big family.Hopefully, if we’re blessed,we will have one more child.

How did your firstborn adjust to having a sibling?
Every child reacts differently,but it’s a huge emotional adjustment.The parallel I’ve been toldis to imagine that your partnerbrought home another woman,and she’s going to live with younow. It’s that hard for childrento wrap their minds around anew sibling. Daniel is obsessed with his older brother, but Thomis not that interested in him yet.Once they can play together, Ithink they’ll both love it.

What advice would you give to other expanding families?
Go for what youwant and you will figure outhow to do it. The more we thinkabout things, the more afraidwe are to do them. When I firstgave birth, my lactation consultant wisely told me to trust myinstincts. The most importantthing that children need is loveand attention. There’s not onebest way to have a family.

As an icon in women’s fashion, how do you feel being in a house full of boys?
Because I don’t have agirl, I’m always trying to dressthem up. My toddler now rebelsand wants to dress in all sportsoutfits. I protest as much as Ican! But he’s starting to develophis own fashion sense.

Do you hope your unique fashion sense sets an example for your kids to express themselves?
In howI dress and how I live, I don’tlike being like everybody else.I hope that the way I presentmyself—though some mightthink it’s wacky—will help mychildren to think beyond thebox that the world tries to putthem in. My boys and I spendhours making up stories andgames together, and we alsohost creativity events at The Tot.I want to promote imagination inall children.

What advice would you give to working moms?
Iknow a mother of two who hasbeen a CEO for over 25 years ina very male-dominated marketplace.She attributes her greatrelationship with her children tobeing fully present. When sheis home and with family, thereis no work. When she’s at work,she’s focused on the job. A lotof us moms feel so torn or judgeourselves when we go back towork, but it’s important to stickwith your decision—no momguilt allowed!

To see Nasiba's pregnancy must-haves, click here:

To read Nasiba's Mom Next Door profile from November 2017, click here: